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Helping Out? (In a small way)


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Hey all,

I would like to know if there is ANYWAY AT ALL that I can help get Canadian Soccer to where it should be.

Next year I plan to goto a Toronto Lynx game (maybe more), but there must be something else I can do. Today I e-mailed a Toronto radio soccer show and asked them to cover the National Team more. What else should I be doing? I would really enjoy any help you can give me.

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1st. The best thing you could do is NOT go to a Toronto Lynx match. Oh, wait. They'll be in the PDL next season. Ah, Hell. It's got to be safe to go.

2nd. Come to Edmonton for the WYC and buy me a lager or two. Vocal Cord Lubricant I call it. We'll see if that voice of yours is any good for football, eh? Supporters should be the opposite of children, the more seen and heard the better and I find beer always helps with that. (Unless soccer moms aren't actively looking for new seats for the kiddies as-far-away-from-you-as-possible by the 20 minute mark of the 1st half, you're just not serious about this whole football thing).

3rd. Make an Owen Hargreaves voodoo doll and buy lots of knitting needles. In the absence of needles any old rusty nail will suffice. How you personaly feel about the old, tired, Hargreaves saga is moot. Torment the lad in the name of Voyageur solidarity.

4th. Speaking of torment. Egg Kevin Pipe's house on Halo'ween. Send me an e-mail. I'll give you his address (thanks again, Fury!). How you personaly feel about the old, tired, CSA bashing is moot. Torment the man in the name of Voyageur solidarity.

5th. Repeat step two.

6th. Get yee a Canada shirt and wear it during matchs. Doesn't matter if the matchs are broadcast or no, wear the damned thing. People will ask and you'll get to tell them why you're wearing it. If Canada wins, don't, I repear don't wash it. No matter how much the girlfriend/boyfriend complains you simply do not wash the game shirt after a victory. Hockey players know what they're doing here. Wait till we loose one, then you can Tide the **** out of the thing.

7th. Repeat step two.

There. Hope that helps.

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Get compromising pictures of Jonathon De Guzman and De Jong spending a small portion of their salary on any of the pleasures available legally in Holland and threaten to show them to their parents if they don't commit to Canada. Unfortunately this won't work with Adam Street because there are no pleasures in England, legal or otherwise, to tempt him with.

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