Every Shmuck and His Grandmother

[Robert]

v

[Robert]

The greatest frustration confronting Canada’s soccer community is the CSA’s ongoing ignorance to think outside of the box. This deficiency continues to be exhibited year after year, as the perpetually unsolved problem of coming up with a viable plan for a professional Canadian soccer league keeps being brought up as the main topic of conversation every time Canada extends its perfect record of futility when it comes to qualifying for the CONCACAF Hex and the subsequent FIFA World Cup Final. When will the CSA finally quit trying to fit a square peg into a round hole? Collectively, every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada have long since known that “it isn’t going to F_CKING work without a professional domestic structure in place!” Until that happens, Canadian talent will not be afforded sufficient opportunities to develop enough players to qualify for any major international competitions.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada know that this country sucks at soccer.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada know that the CSA has, is and will continue to be run by a bunch of incompetent fools as long as the current election process, which only considers candidates who have been programmed to think the unsuccessful CSA way, is adhered to.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada realized on January 6, 2000, that the CSA was taken for a $60,000 ride by KPMG when the governing soccer body received in exchange for that princely sum the paltry “four critical success factors.” These consisted of:

1) Proponents – Each team must have the long-term support of a financially capable, qualified ownership management group.

2) Long-term Financing Support – Whether at the team or league level, sufficient financial resources must be in place to ensure the stability of the league (and potential operating losses) over a period of at least five years from the date of commencement.

3) Venues – The playing surfaces and surrounding spectator amenities (e.g., seating, concessions, parking) must be commensurate with a professional league.

4) Organization Structure – The league itself must be managed in a professional manner by individuals with directly relevant expertise and the absence of conflicts of interest.

The KPMG report concluded with: “Based on the interviews and field work conducted to date, we believe the viability of a Canadian professional soccer league is risky and highly speculative.” Signed: Lyle Hall, KPMG.

Hey, no sh_t Einstein. Thanks for having us. It’s nice being had. 60,000 big ones for that! Is the CSA comprised of a bunch of incompetent morons? Hell no! That would do a grave injustice to the words “incompetent morons.”

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada recognize the bogus plans that even dumber fools, like Gerry Gentile, try to sell to the CSA. This charming, snake-oil salesman’s 5 step strategic plan to “Always Qualify For The FIFA World Cup Finals” included everything except reinventing the game of soccer itself. From hiring a world-class CEO, who would take the job not for the money but for the challenge, to building 20 new low-cost national training centers across the country, to hiring 20 UEFA “A” licensed international coaches, to establishing a fully funded National Amateur Soccer League borrowed from the French association’s example, to an unelaborated scheme on how to fund such a complete overhaul of the Canadian soccer system. Thank God the CSA didn’t hand this shyster the key to the Canadian Kingdom.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada understand how straightforward it is to develop talent. Good coaches can’t make good soccer players. A soccer player is either good, or he isn’t. Good coaches can only make good soccer players play good soccer. A soccer good player also needs to play as often as possible with and against other good players to become a better soccer player.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada realize that in the past 13 years nothing has changed in the way the CSA governs Canadian soccer, and that Victor Montagliani is just another disappointment in a long line of previous disappointments. His two untelevised international friendlies arranged for January in the United States, prove he is leading us down the same path that the CSA took us on following Canada’s 3-0 loss to Jamaica in the World Cup cycle previous to the one that was just completed with an 8-1 annihilation in Honduras. How these two untelevised away friendlies, with an interim coach, are going to improve or promote Canadian soccer is anyone’s guess.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada realize that if they want to see Canada compete at the 2018 World Cup Final in Russia, then the time has come to make some serious changes.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada would agree that Robert’s plan for a viable Canadian professional soccer structure, which is designed to develop only talent that is eligible to represent Canada in World Cup competition, and with very limited risk and not speculative, is an absolute steal at $8,400 compared to the highway robbery committed by KPMG.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada will immediately detect the sheer genius of Robert’s plan the moment they lay eyes on it. The question remains, when will the CSA realize this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity?

In a brief summary why he would like to be elected President of the Canadian Soccer Association, Mr. Montagliani expressed that he possessed the “leadership, passion and a burning desire to deliver excellent outcomes for the Canadian Soccer Association.”

http://www.canadasoccer.com/files/CSA_Vision_President_Montagliani_EN.pdf

An 8-1 defeat in Canada’s most critical World Cup qualifying match over the past 15 years, does not constitute an “excellent outcome” by any stretch of anyone’s imagination, does it Victor? Now if you were honest about your conclusion that “leadership is about service, and you wish to serve,” isn’t it time you tendered your resignation, as you obviously have no idea or intend to acquire a plan on how to improve the current unacceptable state of Canadian soccer? No where do you mention anything about listening to the concerns of Canada’s soccer community. For years, exasperated Canadian fans and media alike have been pleading for the CSA to establish a professional domestic structure, and once again, for the past year, their request has continued to fall upon deaf ears. Waiting another four years for another control-freak to do absolutely nothing different will definitely not generate any growth for soccer in Canada!

[Joe MacCarthy]

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada would agree that Robert’s plan for a viable Canadian professional soccer structure, which is designed to develop only talent that is eligible to represent Canada in World Cup competition. With very limited risk and not speculative, this plan is an absolute steal at $8,400 compared to the highway robbery committed by KPMG.

Every shmuck and his grandmother in Canada will immediately detect the sheer genius of Robert’s plan the moment they lay eyes on it. The question remains, when will the CSA realize this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity?

Have you considered the Vaudeville stage, you are frigging hilarious

[Joe MacCarthy]

v

This v that you put in your first posts lately, is that some sort of alien communication code or just an inability to decipher the intricacies of cut and paste.

[Redcoatsforever]

This v that you put in your first posts lately, is that some sort of alien communication code or just an inability to decipher the intricacies of cut and paste.

Why would anyone want to communicate with the aliens? Communication with them is the surest path to being devoured whole after being tortured for hours as they look through your brain so they can learn to manipulate the human system.

You see, when you're a genius like me the aliens understand that you're not just a pathetic sheep like everyone else around here (they've been observing us for years, after all) and they naturally want to pick at your brain. Hence my "funny" hat, it protects me from all of the various signals being sent through the wifi and into human brains. A lot of people think "Wifi" is just a play on the term "Hi-Fi" and the word "Wireless", but it isn't. Wifi actually stands for World Information Freedom Impeder. It's used to make certain thoughts go away, entirely at the convenience of the aliens, the government, the secret USSR remnant that live in the Galapagos Islands, or whoever else may be using them.

"But Robert," you Sheeple may ask "why would the aliens be concerned with taking over a soccer board?" which is probably a question that you were programmed to ask by Powerade - I'll come back to that later - but I'll answer it anyways. The Canadian Soccer Association, under the direction of Victor Montagliani (Codename: Mont Vic) and Peter Montopoli (Codename: Mont Pete, did you really think he'd left?) are broadcast some waves on the wifi. Controlling the human mind is not a difficult task when you have the means, and if you were to go into the Canadian Soccer Associations headquarters, I'm sure you'd find not one but several modems for the Wifi. Why would anyone need more than one machine to access the Wifi? Simple: to manipulate it, and you into doing what they want.

There may be a few of you out there still questioning whether or not this is a real plan on the part of the CSA, you might be asking yourself why I mentioned Powerade, or what aliens have to do with any of this. Well, Sheeple, I'm disappointed in you but I guess we can't all have my brain and therefore my genius plans. I'll explain. The aliens make Powerade, and use the CSA logo on the side of the bottle to advertise the product. By tricking poor, unsuspecting, and stupid Canadians into drinking the Powerade through the use of soccer, the aliens are able to slowly marinate the juicy, juicy innards of the human population for their later consumption. In exchange for the logo use, the aliens have granted access to the CSA to use the machine to their own ends, installing Mont Vic and Mont Pete as the heads of the CSA. They also use The Wifi to convince you to drink more Powerade, and the proof is at the CSA itself. In addition to having multiple modems for The Wifi you see, the CSA is run by two people successively: Victor Montagliani and Peter Montopoli. Both of these "men" (they hate men, that's why they give all of the money to the girls' side of the game, also to make Canada look "progressive" in the eyes of the world and thus sell more Powerade) have name beginning with the letters "mont". THAT IS A PATTERN. It is meant to signal to the reptiloid aliens and the Satanists in California that "The Mountain" (A Codename for this place: link) is still in control of the situation. Need more proof? "Mont" is the French word for "Mountain", remember how "mont" also was in the last names of the CSA leaders? Well it's also in the name of the largest city in Quebec: Montreal! Which is IN Canada. Where is the CSA IN Canada.

This evidence is incontrovertible! Wake up! You are being controlled!

You owe me $8,400.00 (CDN) for your liberation. You're welcome.

The preceding was written by author Robert Yanning, and has been sent to every major newspaper in Ontario.

[Olympique_de_Marseille]

Λ

[RS]

Why would anyone want to communicate with the aliens? Communication with them is the surest path to being devoured whole after being tortured for hours as they look through your brain so they can learn to manipulate the human system.

You see, when you're a genius like me the aliens understand that you're not just a pathetic sheep like everyone else around here (they've been observing us for years, after all) and they naturally want to pick at your brain. Hence my "funny" hat, it protects me from all of the various signals being sent through the wifi and into human brains. A lot of people think "Wifi" is just a play on the term "Hi-Fi" and the word "Wireless", but it isn't. Wifi actually stands for World Information Freedom Impeder. It's used to make certain thoughts go away, entirely at the convenience of the aliens, the government, the secret USSR remnant that live in the Galapagos Islands, or whoever else may be using them.

"But Robert," you Sheeple may ask "why would the aliens be concerned with taking over a soccer board?" which is probably a question that you were programmed to ask by Powerade - I'll come back to that later - but I'll answer it anyways. The Canadian Soccer Association, under the direction of Victor Montagliani (Codename: Mont Vic) and Peter Montopoli (Codename: Mont Pete, did you really think he'd left?) are broadcast some waves on the wifi. Controlling the human mind is not a difficult task when you have the means, and if you were to go into the Canadian Soccer Associations headquarters, I'm sure you'd find not one but several modems for the Wifi. Why would anyone need more than one machine to access the Wifi? Simple: to manipulate it, and you into doing what they want.

There may be a few of you out there still questioning whether or not this is a real plan on the part of the CSA, you might be asking yourself why I mentioned Powerade, or what aliens have to do with any of this. Well, Sheeple, I'm disappointed in you but I guess we can't all have my brain and therefore my genius plans. I'll explain. The aliens make Powerade, and use the CSA logo on the side of the bottle to advertise the product. By tricking poor, unsuspecting, and stupid Canadians into drinking the Powerade through the use of soccer, the aliens are able to slowly marinate the juicy, juicy innards of the human population for their later consumption. In exchange for the logo use, the aliens have granted access to the CSA to use the machine to their own ends, installing Mont Vic and Mont Pete as the heads of the CSA. They also use The Wifi to convince you to drink more Powerade, and the proof is at the CSA itself. In addition to having multiple modems for The Wifi you see, the CSA is run by two people successively: Victor Montagliani and Peter Montopoli. Both of these "men" (they hate men, that's why they give all of the money to the girls' side of the game, also to make Canada look "progressive" in the eyes of the world and thus sell more Powerade) have name beginning with the letters "mont". THAT IS A PATTERN. It is meant to signal to the reptiloid aliens and the Satanists in California that "The Mountain" (A Codename for this place: link) is still in control of the situation. Need more proof? "Mont" is the French word for "Mountain", remember how "mont" also was in the last names of the CSA leaders? Well it's also in the name of the largest city in Quebec: Montreal! Which is IN Canada. Where is the CSA IN Canada.

This evidence is incontrovertible! Wake up! You are being controlled!

You owe me $8,400.00 (CDN) for your liberation. You're welcome.

The preceding was written by author Robert Yanning, and has been sent to every major newspaper in Ontario.

[tmcmurph]

Ctrl + v = paste

Just in case you missed that first part you hold down the Ctrl (control) key and AT THE SAME TIME (don't release the Ctrl key) press the lower case "v" character (without the quotes)

Hope that helps

[madmonte]

Why would anyone want to communicate with the aliens? Communication with them is the surest path to being devoured whole after being tortured for hours as they look through your brain so they can learn to manipulate the human system.

You see, when you're a genius like me the aliens understand that you're not just a pathetic sheep like everyone else around here (they've been observing us for years, after all) and they naturally want to pick at your brain. Hence my "funny" hat, it protects me from all of the various signals being sent through the wifi and into human brains. A lot of people think "Wifi" is just a play on the term "Hi-Fi" and the word "Wireless", but it isn't. Wifi actually stands for World Information Freedom Impeder. It's used to make certain thoughts go away, entirely at the convenience of the aliens, the government, the secret USSR remnant that live in the Galapagos Islands, or whoever else may be using them.

"But Robert," you Sheeple may ask "why would the aliens be concerned with taking over a soccer board?" which is probably a question that you were programmed to ask by Powerade - I'll come back to that later - but I'll answer it anyways. The Canadian Soccer Association, under the direction of Victor Montagliani (Codename: Mont Vic) and Peter Montopoli (Codename: Mont Pete, did you really think he'd left?) are broadcast some waves on the wifi. Controlling the human mind is not a difficult task when you have the means, and if you were to go into the Canadian Soccer Associations headquarters, I'm sure you'd find not one but several modems for the Wifi. Why would anyone need more than one machine to access the Wifi? Simple: to manipulate it, and you into doing what they want.

There may be a few of you out there still questioning whether or not this is a real plan on the part of the CSA, you might be asking yourself why I mentioned Powerade, or what aliens have to do with any of this. Well, Sheeple, I'm disappointed in you but I guess we can't all have my brain and therefore my genius plans. I'll explain. The aliens make Powerade, and use the CSA logo on the side of the bottle to advertise the product. By tricking poor, unsuspecting, and stupid Canadians into drinking the Powerade through the use of soccer, the aliens are able to slowly marinate the juicy, juicy innards of the human population for their later consumption. In exchange for the logo use, the aliens have granted access to the CSA to use the machine to their own ends, installing Mont Vic and Mont Pete as the heads of the CSA. They also use The Wifi to convince you to drink more Powerade, and the proof is at the CSA itself. In addition to having multiple modems for The Wifi you see, the CSA is run by two people successively: Victor Montagliani and Peter Montopoli. Both of these "men" (they hate men, that's why they give all of the money to the girls' side of the game, also to make Canada look "progressive" in the eyes of the world and thus sell more Powerade) have name beginning with the letters "mont". THAT IS A PATTERN. It is meant to signal to the reptiloid aliens and the Satanists in California that "The Mountain" (A Codename for this place: link) is still in control of the situation. Need more proof? "Mont" is the French word for "Mountain", remember how "mont" also was in the last names of the CSA leaders? Well it's also in the name of the largest city in Quebec: Montreal! Which is IN Canada. Where is the CSA IN Canada.

This evidence is incontrovertible! Wake up! You are being controlled!

You owe me $8,400.00 (CDN) for your liberation. You're welcome.

The preceding was written by author Robert Yanning, and has been sent to every major newspaper in Ontario.

Ho..ly.... Sh... Ok. THAT is great work, publish THAT.

[BringBackTheBlizzard]

...For years, exasperated Canadian fans and media alike have been pleading for the CSA to establish a professional domestic structure, and once again, for the past year, their request has continued to fall upon deaf ears...

I'm no fan of the CSA but they did manage to use the 2007 U-20 World Cup to get a stadium built in Toronto, which led to the emergence of TFC in MLS, whose success off the field led to the emergence of MLS teams in Vancouver and Montreal. All three are now investing heavily in academy systems, so there are reasons for optimism where Canadian content on their rosters is concerned even if things are less than stellar from that standpoint at the moment.

Despite the departure of the three largest cities from the D2 level of the sport, there will soon be teams in both Ottawa and Edmonton in that regard leaving only Calgary as a city with more than 1 million people lacking a pro soccer team, while at a lower player development level a team in London, Ont recently won the PDL championship with a lot of Canadian players on their team.

From the outside looking in, the CSA's call for a professional domestic structure looks a bit bizarre against that backdrop given the progress that is being made by using the USSF's league structure. I suspect it is probably more a case of a soccer bureacrats' empire building to enhance their level of control than doing what's best for the sport. People investing their own hard earned cash in pro soccer do not appear to be interested in having the CSA rather than the USSF calling the shots.

Probably best if people, who lack the cash to put the money where their mouth is, respected that and stopped using the absence of a national league as a diversionary tactic every time the national team has a bad performance, when what really needs to be looked at is why the CSA are not making an effort to hire an experienced coach for the team.

[Robert]

I'm no fan of the CSA but they did manage to use the 2007 U-20 World Cup to get a stadium built in Toronto, which led to the emergence of TFC in MLS, whose success off the field led to the emergence of MLS teams in Vancouver and Montreal. All three are now investing heavily in academy systems, so there are reasons for optimism where Canadian content on their rosters is concerned even if things are less than stellar from that standpoint at the moment.

That’s a different point of view. I can buy into the logic that BMO field is a legacy of the 2007 U-20 World Cup and that the $75 million taxpayer-paid-for stadium was an integral factor in Toronto being awarded an MLS franchise. However, I am not at all convinced that MLS teams in Vancouver and Montreal emerged as a direct result of Toronto’s presence in the MLS. After all, we here on the West Coast already had a pretty decent stadium that we put a $575 million non-taxpayer-paid-for roof on. It will be interesting to see what kind of 2015 Women’s World Cup legacy the CSA can scrounge-up.

To avoid digressing from the original point of this thread, which focused on the unwillingness of Victor “the BURNING DESIRE TO DELIVER EXCELLENT OUTCOMES FOR THE CSA” Montagliani to listen to what is important to Canada’s soccer community. It is obvious from his application for the presidency of the Canadian Soccer Association that the establishment a profession Canadian soccer structure is not on his agenda. It is also an undeniable fact that for as long as any Canadian soccer enthusiast can remember, that it is the opinion of most Canadians who care about soccer that a professional Canadian soccer structure that develops talent which will feed into the national team is what is needed the most in this country. It appears that because Victor “the BURNING DESIRE TO DELIVER EXCELLENT OUTCOMES FOR THE CSA” Montagliani can not find a viable plan to implement such a structure he has completely abandoned the idea of building a professional domestic structure in its entirety.

Therefore, if Victor “the BURNING DESIRE TO DELIVER EXCELLENT OUTCOMES FOR THE CSA” Montagliani has given up on a professional domestic soccer structure, combined with his past year’s track-record that consists of an 8-1 annihilation in Honduras and 3 international untelevised friendlies on Mickey Mouse fields in the United States, which definitely ignores the third factor of the KPMG’s report, which that the venues – The playing surfaces and surrounding spectator amenities (e.g., seating, concessions, parking) must be commensurate with a professional league, then why is he still in office? Now I’m as much a supporter of new technology as the next guy, however, when it comes to following the national team play an international friendly by means of Rudi’s twitter, then I really have to draw a firm line in the sand and say, “Enough of this sh*t.” Canada’s next international friendly will be played at Tucson, Arizona, on January 26, 2013, against Denmark. Please check the CSA website at http://www.canadasoccer.com/ for the time and broadcast listing in your area. This game is brought to you by Victor “the BURNING DESIRE TO DELIVER EXCELLENT OUTCOMES FOR THE CSA” Montagliani.

It is as clear as day to me, that with Victor “the BURNING DESIRE TO DELIVER EXCELLENT OUTCOMES FOR THE CSA” Montagliani in charge of the CSA that Canadian soccer is going nowhere but down a steep hill. Granted, he did a wonderful job helping the girls win that much-hyped bronze medal in London, so maybe there is a place for him to serve in that capacity. However, when it comes to looking after the affairs of the BIG BOYS and real soccer it’s blatantly obvious that poor ol’ Victor “the BURNING DESIRE TO DELIVER EXCELLENT OUTCOMES FOR THE CSA” Montagliani is way out of his LEAGUE. (Oh yeah, that’s right. He doesn’t want a league.)

[lazlo_80]

I could be out of the loop, but isn't there a feasibility study coming out sometime this year that will talk about whether a domestic league makes sense? Wasn't he one of the people that ordered that study be made?

There's a lot of big moving parts to these sort of decisions. Even if it is a go, it's not something that can happen overnight. The guy has been in the office for a year now? Even if the feasibility study showed it made sense a year ago we wouldn't be anywhere close to a league by now.

[Robert]

I could be out of the loop, but isn't there a feasibility study coming out sometime this year that will talk about whether a domestic league makes sense? Wasn't he one of the people that ordered that study be made?

There's a lot of big moving parts to these sort of decisions. Even if it is a go, it's not something that can happen overnight. The guy has been in the office for a year now? Even if the feasibility study showed it made sense a year ago we wouldn't be anywhere close to a league by now.

If this is correct, and it is a feasability study about a league and not a structure, then it will be a complete waste of time and money because the results will be identical to that of the KPMG report from 13 years ago.

As far as Victor “the BURNING DESIRE TO DELIVER EXCELLENT OUTCOMES FOR THE CSA” Montagliani is concerned, how long do you want to give him before you can decide he is not the right man to be president of the CSA? A year? Two years? Four years?

1) He has made no announcement of a feasability study. (Which would buy him another year in office if he did.)

2) He was in charge when Canada suffered the 8-1 humiliation. Canada's worst World Cup defeat EVER! He should have never applied for the job midway through a World Cup cycle. A major career blunder.

3) Hiring another interim head coach. We've been down this road many times before.

4) Trinidad & Tobago untelevised friendly in the United States.

5) Denmark untelevised friendly in the United States.

How many screw-ups do you need? That's at least five major screw-ups of the top of my head during his first 8 months in office!

[lazlo_80]

I believe it did include structure. I believe Richard Whitall, the editor for the counter attack blog had a hand in it.

I know because of the geography of this country there was discussion around how exactly the structure of the league would work, the "tier", regional divisions vs. national, etc etc.

[lazlo_80]

Just following up, found this little tid-bit on the counter attack blog alluding to the report that is to be released. The article is about the incorporation of the USL into MLS reserve league play...

"There are many unanswered questions though. What—if anything—does this portend for NASL’s future? Will it simply carry forward as a de facto D2? And what does this mean for Canadian clubs, and the future of Canadian player development (particularly in light of the recommendations of a study yet-to-be-released and minorly co-authored by yours truly)?"

Sounds like they might allude to the report a little bit more in a post tomorrow.

[BringBackTheBlizzard]

This podcast is worth a listen for what happened with the Rethink study and what they recommended to the CSA:

http://itscalledfootball.podhoster.com/index.php?pid=29941

This is the url for Richard Whittall's blog entry that was mentioned above:

http://blogs.thescore.com/counterattack/2013/01/23/mls-and-the-organic-growth-of-a-real-north-american-soccer-pyramid/