Speculative whispering engulfs the room until the door opens once again and Ryan Nelsen enters. Assembled group stands up in ovation.
Ryan Nelsen: Oh, too kind, really. Really, stop it.
Unnamed Man: Come on in, Ryan. Have a seat. We're so happy to see you.
Nelsen: Thank you, thank you. I've never been in a group like this before, but I'm sure that lack of experience won't be an impediment at all.
Unnamed Man: Right. *clears throat* So, I'm sure all of you know Ryan's story...
Nelsen: (interrupting) I've played in big games! I've played in the World Cup!
Momentary silence.
Torsten Frings: Well, so did I.
Amado Guevara: Me too.
Julio Cesar: Everybody plays in the World Cup, don't they?
Samuel: Even I have!
Andrea Lombardo: Do under-20 World Cups count?
All: No!
Lombardo: 
Knock at the door. A man pokes his head in.
Jermain Defoe: Hey, did someone say World Cup?
Unnamed Man: You're not scheduled to be here for another four months!
Defoe: Whoops, sorry!
Door closes.
Unnamed Man: Gentlemen, let's focus here. You'll note that since our last meeting, TFC has lost three straight games against conference rivals! They haven't scored a goal! They've slipped from a comfortable playoff spot to almost being out of contention altogether! And we've got Ryan to thank for that!
Group applauds, except for one member who stands up.
Sam Cronin: Wait a minute, I still don't understand this.
Earnshaw: Oh, here we go again...
Cronin: Ryan got fired after the New England game. How does he get credit for the two losses since then?
Earnshaw: Why don't you just...
Cronin: And also, how does he get credit with helping our cause when he was still there? I mean, one can't be a TFC Castaway if they're still with the team, right? It's a paradox.
Unnamed Man: Sam, Sam, Sam. What are we going to do with you?
Cronin: I dunno, listen to my grievances and take measures to ensure they're addressed?
Group erupts into laughter.
Unnamed Man: Oh Sam, you're talking like a TFC fan now. It's so adorable.
Amarikwa: Hahaha, I get it!
Gala: Shut up!
Unnamed Man: Gentlemen, the simple truth is this -- Toronto FC is falling apart, again. Toronto FC will miss the playoffs, again. And however it comes about, and whoever is responsible for it, our mission is once again being fulfilled.
Loud throat-clearing from one member of the group.
Unnamed Man: But this week, our plaudits go to our brethren in Philadelphia. Conor, who is clearly battling some kind of throat irritation, really got us off on the right foot with that early goal.
Conor Casey: Hey, yeah, that's me. Y'know, no problem, whatever, just doing my job. Cool, right. Yeah. Cool.
Unnamed Man: Next time, perhaps you could wait until most of the fans have shown up, though. It always makes it sweeter to break as many of their hearts as possible.
Casey: Oh, yeah, cool, alright. Conor does what Conor does, y'know. Yeah.
Unnamed Man: Right. And Maurice, we'll do what we can to make sure you get credit where it's due. I'm pretty sure I saw you get a touch on that second goal. Everyone saw that, right?
Muttering from group suggests agreement.
Unnamed Man: Maurice, why don't you take a bow?
Group starts looking around, expecting to see him. He is nowhere to be found.
Unnamed Man: That's strange. Perhaps he's just late.
Cronin: Or maybe he knows the truth!
Earnshaw: Oh for the love of... you want me to take care of him, boss?
Unnamed Man: No, no. It's always good to have dissenting voices within any organization. After all, it's worked well for Toronto FC, hasn't it?
Group erupts in uproarious laughter. Attention turns to Amarikwa.
Amarikwa: ...I don't get it.
Gala: It's irony.
Amarikwa: You mean like a coincidence?
Gala: No, a coincidence isn't irony.
Amarikwa: Yeah it is.
Gala: No it isn't. Just because dummies constantly use a word incorrectly over and over, that doesn't make their definition correct.
Earnshaw: Then how come they changed the dictionary definition of "literally" to mean "figuratively"?
Gala: They did?
Earnshaw: They did.
Gala: Wow. That's literally the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
Earnshaw: What an ironic thing to say!
Group erupts in laughter. Attention turns to Amarikwa.
Amarikwa: Oh... I get it now!
Group focuses rapt attention on Amarikwa, waiting to see if he really got it.
Amarikwa: The internal dysfunction is what has made TFC the club it is, and that lack of stability has not only meant poor results, but also resulted in such a preposterous degree of player turnover that they more or less play against a former player every single week, despite not having even completed eight seasons in the league. And boss was ironically stating that dissent was a good thing for our group, as a means of paralleling it with the club we're all here to fight against.
Group pauses.
Gala: ... I don't get it.
Samuel: And then I ate the bowl!
Group erupts in uproarious laughter again.