Watching TFC reminds me of
I wrote them off for the tenth time today
I thought about what the tifo would say
But then they scored
I lost my nerve
I took them back and bought a new shirt
I don’t think I’m alone. We’re in an unbalanced relationship with the Reds and we’re well aware of it. We spend hours out of every day telling all our friends about how we need to move on – and those that don’t really know them the way you know them agree 100 per cent – but when it gets right down to it we just can’t.
[PRBREAK][/PRBREAK]In your mind you even have sometimes. You’ve convinced yourself to accept the healthier, but less dramatic, relationship you’re in (Euro/South American club), you can’t help yourself.
Even though there are times when they can make you feel lower than low, the opposite can happen too. No one can make you feel as alive as they do. It’s precisely because of the fleeting nature of those good times – it’s rarely predictable when the good days will come – that you keep going back.
Nothing you’ve ever experienced feels as real or as awesome as when you even get the smallest bit of reward from them. Nothing. It’s irrational, and you know it. No one else does it to you either. Just them. Anyone else and you’d have moved on years ago.
They know they have you too. Everyone knows they have you and that you will pretty much take any amount of abuse. They make you weak. They make you a sucker with low self-esteem. They know that they can knock on your door at any time and, well…
But, is there a breaking point? Is there a time when you stop being so dumb and grow a pair? If there ever was it’s now. Turn the tables and make them think about it for once. The few times you have done that in the past they have come back stronger. They have, briefly, given you the upper hand.
You’re smart enough to understand that they can only give you so much right now – there are limits to what they are capable of providing for, likely, a few more years yet. But, you can demand a little more.
For now, “a little more” doesn’t have to be every week, and there doesn’t need to be any consistent expectation, but you need to have your damn mind blown when it does happen.
They’ll still be playing you, but if the good times are hot enough it will sustain you through the indifferent efforts. After all, you may be dumb, but you’re not a dweeb – you’re just self-aware enough to realize that you’re not going anywhere because you like the abuse.
So, you might as well make dessert. Besides you are damn good at it.